Drew: We all know this deal is as certain as death and taxes.
Joe Black: Death and taxes?
Drew: Yes.
Joe Black: Death and taxes?
Drew: Yes.
Joe Black: What an odd pairing.

I should have my head examined again.

Allison

William Parrish: You want me to be your guide?
Joe Black: You fit the bill, Bill.

When I introduce you, and I tell them who you are, I don't think anyone will stay for dinner.

William Parrish

Drew: And who would've thought... you, an IRS agent.
Joe Black: Death and Taxes.

Don't blow smoke up my ass, it will ruin my autopsy.

William Parrish

Careful Bill, you'll give yourself a heart attack and ruin my vacation.

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Meet Joe Black Quotes

Joe Black: Don't be feisty, sista.
Jamaican Woman: I not be feisty mista. You com' for me that's good news.
Joe Black: Can do no right by people. I com' to take you you want to stay - I leave you stay, you want to go.

Don't blow smoke up my ass, it will ruin my autopsy.

William Parrish