Virginia McCain: Well, whoever she is, she sure likes to read a lot.
Sheriff John T. 'Buster' McCain: Virginia, I'm flattered that you think I have that kind of energy. I figure that if I can't find Paul Sheldon, at least I'll find out what he wrote about.
Virginia McCain: Well, what do you expect to find? A story about a guy who drove his car off a cliff in a snowstorm?
Sheriff John T. 'Buster' McCain: You see, it's just that kind of sarcasm that's given our marriage real spice.

Virginia McCain: [talking to Jim Taylor] No, he's not here. I don't know where he is, he never tells me anything any more. Probably out having an affair somewhere.
[Buster walks in]
Virginia McCain: Oh, here he is.
[hands Buster phone]
Virginia McCain: It's Jim Taylor, he wants to know who you're having an affair with.

Now that's an oogie mess.

Annie Wilkes

Annie Wilkes: What's the ceiling that Dago painted?
Paul Sheldon: The Sistine Chapel?

Annie Wilkes: It's the swearing, Paul. It has no nobility.
Paul Sheldon: These are slum kids. I was a slum kid. Everybody talks like that.
Annie Wilkes: THEY DO NOT! At the feedstore do I say, "Oh, now Wally, give me a bag of that F-in' pig feed, and a pound of that bitchly cow corn"? At the bank do I say, "Oh, Mrs. Malenger, here is one big bastard of a check, now give me some of your Christ-ing money!" THERE, LOOK THERE, NOW SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!

Paul Sheldon: You know I never tasted meatloaf quite like this, what's your secret?
Annie Wilkes: My secret is, I always use fresh tomatoes, never canned. And to give it that extra zip, I mix a little Spam with the ground beef!
Paul Sheldon: Can't get this in a restaurant in New York.
Annie Wilkes: Oh, no.

Annie Wilkes: Anything else I can get for you while I am in town? How about a tiny tape recorder, or how about a homemade pair of writing slippers?
Paul Sheldon: Annie, what's the matter?
Annie Wilkes: What's the matter? WHAT'S THE MATTER? I will tell you what's the matter! I go out of my way for you! I do everything to try and make you happy. I feed you, I clean you, I dress you, and what thanks do I get? "Oh, you bought the wrong paper, Anne, I can't write on this paper, Anne!" Well, I'll get your stupid paper but you just better start showing me a little appreciation around here, Mr. MAN!

Annie Wilkes: God came to me last night and told me your purpose for being here. I am going to help you write a new book.
Paul Sheldon: You think I can just whip one out?
Annie Wilkes: Oh, but I don't think Paul, I know.

[after smashing Paul's ankles with a sledgehammer] ... God I love you.

Annie Wilkes

Annie Wilkes: Here's your pills.
Paul Sheldon: Annie? Annie, what is it?
Annie Wilkes: The rain. Sometimes it gives me the blues. When you first came here, I only loved the writer part of Paul Sheldon. Now I know I love the rest of him, too. I know you don't love me, don't say you do. You're beautiful, brilliant, a famous man of the world and I'm... not a movie star type. You'll never know the fear of losing someone like you if you're someone like me.

Paul Sheldon: Why would you lose me?
Annie Wilkes: Book's almost finished, your legs are getting better. Soon you'll be wanting to leave.
Paul Sheldon: Why would I leave? I like it here.
Annie Wilkes: That's very kind of you, but I'll bet it's not all together true.
[pulls a gun]
Annie Wilkes: I have this gun.
[pulls trigger]
Annie Wilkes: Sometimes I think about using it. I'd better go now. I might put bullets in it.

Annie Wilkes: YOU! YOU DIRTY BIRD, HOW COULD YOU!
Paul Sheldon: What?
Annie Wilkes: She can't be dead, MISERY CHASTAIN CANNOT BE DEAD!
Paul Sheldon: Annie, sometimes during childbirth, women don't survive. But Misery's SPIRIT is still alive... we shouldn't forget that.
Annie Wilkes: I DON'T WANT HER SPIRIT! I WANT HER, AND YOU MURDERED HER!
Paul Sheldon: No I didn't.
Annie Wilkes: WHO DID?
Paul Sheldon: She just died, slipped away!
Annie Wilkes: SLIPPED AWAY! NO, YOU MURDERED MY MISERY!

Misery is based on the Stephen King book, and it stars James Caan as an author and Oscar winner Kathy Bates as his obsessed "number one fan."

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Misery Quotes

Annie Wilkes: What's the ceiling that Dago painted?
Paul Sheldon: The Sistine Chapel?

I am your number one fan. There is nothing to worry about. You are going to be just fine. I am your number one fan!

Annie Wilkes