If nagging were an Olympic sport, my Aunt Voula would win a gold medal!

Toula Portokalos

Maria Portokalos: What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?
Gus Portokalos: Is drugs downtown!
Maria Portokalos: What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?
Gus Portokalos: No. But somebody will say to her: take this bag down to the bus depot, and she'll do it!
Maria Portokalos: She is not stupid! She's smart!
Gus Portokalos: I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl.
Maria Portokalos: Oh! You think you're smarter than me, huh?
Gus Portokalos: No, I... I mean... You... you know...

Maria Portokalos: Ian, are you hungry?
Ian Miller: Uh no, I already ate.
Maria Portokalos: Okay, I make you something.

Yianni: Ian, if you're gonna be in this family, I get you some earplugs because the Portokalos women, if they're not nagging someone... THEY DIE!
Toula Portokalos: Ah, you're in so much trouble when I tell my sister!
Athena: Tell me what?

Aunt Voula: Toula. Toula! You're engaged. You're engaged-We never think this would happen for you. Never. *Never.* Taki, didn't we say that...
Uncle Taki: We never think this day would come. Never.

[describing Ian] A xeno with big, long, hair on top of his head!

Gus Portokalos

Toula Portokalos: [narrating] My dad believed in two things: That Greeks should educate non Greeks about being Greek and every ailment from psoriasis to poison ivy can be cured with Windex.

Gus Portokalos: [crying] Why you want to leave me?
Toula Portokalos: I'm not leaving you! Don't you want me to do something with my life?
Gus Portokalos: Yes! Get married, make babies! You look so... old!

[narration] My family is big and loud but they're my family. We fight and we laugh and yes, we roast lamb on a spit in the front yard. And where ever I go, what ever I do they will always be there.

Toula Portokalos

Toula Portokalos: There are three things that every Greek woman must do in life: marry Greek boys, make Greek babies, and feed everyone.

Hey Ian, we're gonna kill ya! Opa!


I gave you life so that you could live it.

Maria Portokalos

FREE Movie Newsletter

My Big Fat Greek Wedding Quotes

Toula Portokalos: What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?
Ian Miller: Uh... yeah.
Toula Portokalos: No, really.
Ian Miller: You don't want to know.
Toula Portokalos: Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it.

Hey Ian, we're gonna kill ya! Opa!