Maria Portokalos: What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?
Gus Portokalos: Is drugs downtown!
Maria Portokalos: What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?
Gus Portokalos: No. But somebody will say to her: take this bag down to the bus depot, and she'll do it!
Maria Portokalos: She is not stupid! She's smart!
Gus Portokalos: I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl.
Maria Portokalos: Oh! You think you're smarter than me, huh?
Gus Portokalos: No, I... I mean... You... you know...

Ian Miller: My parents' names are Rodney and Harriet.
Toula Portokalos: [horrified, looking at wedding invites] Rodney and HARRY!
Nick Portokalos: We didn't notice, so maybe they won't.

Nick Portokalos: Don't let your past dictate who you are, but let it be part of who you will become.
Toula Portokalos: Nick, that's beautiful.
Nick Portokalos: Yeah, that Dear Abby really knows what she's talking about.

If nagging were an Olympic sport, my Aunt Voula would win a gold medal!

Toula Portokalos

Maria Portokalos: Where did you go?
Nick Portokalos: Nowhere.
Maria Portokalos: What did you do?
Nick Portokalos: Nothing.
Maria Portokalos: Who did you see?
Nick Portokalos: No one.

Gus Portokalos: Kimono, kimono, kimono. Ha! Of course! Kimono is come from the Greek word himona, is mean winter. So, what do you wear in the wintertime to stay warm? A robe. You see: robe, kimono. There you go!

I'm a snow beast!

Toula Portokalos

Toula Portokalos: Ma, Dad is so stubborn. What he says goes. "Ah, the man is the head of the house!"
Maria Portokalos: Let me tell you something, Toula. The man is the head, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants.

WHAT is going on? Mr. Pottery class... nice to meet ya.

Nikki

Ian Miller: May I please date your daughter?
Gus Portokalos: NO!

Ian Miller: You're that waitress.
Toula Portokalos: Seating hostess, actually.

Any second now he's gonna look at me and say, "You're so not worth this."

Toula Portokalos

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My Big Fat Greek Wedding Quotes

Toula Portokalos: What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?
Ian Miller: Uh... yeah.
Toula Portokalos: No, really.
Ian Miller: You don't want to know.
Toula Portokalos: Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it.

Hey Ian, we're gonna kill ya! Opa!

Angelo