The Shoveller: Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well.
Lucille: Honey, you shovel better than any man I've ever known, but that does not make you a super hero.
[the Shoveller starts to say something, but Lucille cuts him off]
Lucille: No, listen to me. You're a good husband, and a good father. But that's all. Nothing more.
[she walks offscreen, a small boy wearing a Captain Amazing T-shirt hugs The Shoveller's leg]
Roland, The Shoveler's Son: I believe in you, Daddy!
Lucille: [calling from off-screen] Roland, do *not* encourage your father.

The police ruled my father's death a suicide. They said he fell down an elevator shaft. Onto some bullets.

The Bowler

After all, I am a ticking time bomb of fury.

Mr. Furious

I don't need a compass to know which way the wind shines.

Mr. Furious

Dr. Heller: That's a high-temperature fabric adhesive liquid projector, based on simple dry-cleaning technology. You aim that at a guy, and I'll tell you something: his clothes get so tight he can't even breathe.

A fish-fork is no match for my machine!

Casanova Frankenstein

I'm a superhero, Mother. An effete British superhero.

The Blue Raja

Monica: I don't find you threatening.
Mr. Furious: Oh! Well, you're very, uh... you're very, uh... kind.
Monica: At all.

We're not your classic heros. We're the other guys.

The Shoveller

I have created a beautiful machine that is going to encourage our fellow citizens to share my vision of the future! Can you dig it?

Casanova Frankenstein

We are number one. All others are number two, or lower.

The Sphinx

[to her father's skull, after avenging his death] OK, now I'm going back to graduate school. That was the agreement.

The Bowler

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Mystery Men Quotes

Disco is NOT dead!

Tony P.

The Shoveller: Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well.
Lucille: Honey, you shovel better than any man I've ever known, but that does not make you a super hero.
[the Shoveller starts to say something, but Lucille cuts him off]
Lucille: No, listen to me. You're a good husband, and a good father. But that's all. Nothing more.
[she walks offscreen, a small boy wearing a Captain Amazing T-shirt hugs The Shoveller's leg]
Roland, The Shoveler's Son: I believe in you, Daddy!
Lucille: [calling from off-screen] Roland, do *not* encourage your father.