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Couscous - the food so nice they named it twice.
Dale Denton

Permalink: Couscous - the food so nice they named it twice.

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Has anyone seen my bigger knife?
Ted Jones

Permalink: Has anyone seen my bigger knife?

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Saul: No... I see. The monkey's out of the bottle now!
Dale Denton: What? That's not even.. a figure of speech.
Saul: Pandora can't go back into the box, he only comes out.

Permalink: No... I see. The monkey's out of the bottle now! What? That's ...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Saul: It's like, if you took that Blue Oyster shit I gave you last week, and then that crazy African Kush I had that one time.. and they had a baby. And then meanwhile, that crazy Northern Light shit I had, and that Red shit I had, made a baby. And by some crazy miracle, those two babies got together, and fucked... this would be it!
Dale Denton: [smells the marijuana] Oh. Wow. This is the product of baby fucking.

Permalink: It's like, if you took that Blue Oyster s**t I gave you last we...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Fuck the po-lice!
Saul

Permalink: F**k the po-lice!

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Saul: Wait...what do you mean the battery's dead?
Dale Denton: ... I mean the battery is dead. It ceases to live. The car needs a battery to start, Saul.
Saul: No no... What do you mean, the battery is dead?
Dale Denton: The battery is fucking dead. I don't know how I can word this to you differently.

Permalink: Wait...what do you mean the battery's dead? ... I mean the ba...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Red: Man, just listen: I would just appreciate it if both y'all would just take your shoes off; I mean, this is brand new carpet, you're tracking mud in here - Matheson, you've got British Knights on. I ain't seen anybody wear them since 1987!

Permalink: I would just appreciate it if both y'all would just take your sh...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

The car committed suicide.
Saul

Permalink: The car committed suicide.

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dale Denton: Yeah but if you do bad stuff you're going to come back as something bad like a slug or an anal bead. But if you do something heroic then you'll come back as like an eagle or a dragon, or Jude Law. Now which would you rather be?
Red: The anal bead wouldn't be bad. I mean I guess it would depend on whose anal bead it was.
Dale Denton: It's *my* anal bead.

Permalink: Yeah but if you do bad stuff you're going to come back as somet...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

What the fuck, man? You shot me in my stomach! I'm gonna die now, probably. Man, I had y'all over for dinner! Fish tacos! This is how you do me?
Red

Permalink: What the f**k, man? You shot me in my stomach! I'm gonna die now...

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0