I'll be really quick. You won't feel a thing.

Mike McDermott

First prize at the World Series of Poker is a million bucks. Does it have my name on it? I don't know. But, I'm gonna find out.

Mike McDermott

Mike McDermott: If you had it to do all over again, knowing what would happen, would you make the same choice?
Professor Petrovsky: What choice?

Where did you come up with the scratch for that? You've been rolling fags in the Village again, haven't you?

Lester 'Worm' Murphy

Worm: She's really got him by the balls.
Petra: That's not so bad, is it?
Worm: It depends on the grip!

Worm: You know what always cheers me up?
Mike McDermott: No, what's that?
Worm: Rolled up aces over kings. Check-raising stupid tourists and taking huge pots off of them. Playing all-night high-limit Hold'em at the Taj, "where the sand turns to gold." Stacks and towers of checks I can't even see over.
Mike McDermott: Fuck it, let's go.
Worm: Don't tease me.
Mike McDermott: Let's play some cards.
Worm: Yes!

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Rounders Quotes

You can't lose what you don't put in the middle. But you can't win much either.

Mike McDermott

Like my uncle Les used to say, "When the money is gone, it's time to move on." So enjoy it, you secret handshaking assholes.

Worm