Roy O'Bannon: The thing about your husband, and this is nothing against him, I mean I really like him, but...
[lowering his voice]
Roy O'Bannon: he comes from a very male dominated society.

A 2000-year-old civilization and that's the best you can come up with? Shame on you. Shame on you!

Roy O'Bannon

Father, is this my husband-to-be? He's a toad. If the Emperor is so fond of him, why doesn't he marry him?

Princess Pei Pei

Roy O'Bannon: [to Chon] If people start looking at you funny then just say, "Howdy, partner."
Chon Wang: ...Howdy... partner?
Roy O'Bannon: Say it a little faster than that or people'll think you're slow in the head.

Chon Wang: I got an idea: why don't I pretend I'm sick, and then you can attack the guard when they come in?
Roy O'Bannon: Oh, you mean the sick person routine? Does that still work in China? 'Cause here it's sorta been done to death.

Roy O'Bannon: Ooooh... who's the pretty lady?
Chon Wang: That's my wife!
Roy O'Bannon: How long you been in this country?
Chon Wang: Four days.
Roy O'Bannon: Nice work.

How about that? It's a Mexican standoff. Only we ain't got no Mexicans.

Marshal Nathan Van Cleef

Chon Wang: He took the gold.
Roy O'Bannon: Is that all you care about, the gold? Shame on you.

Now I'm gonna have to get rid of my outlaw name, it just won't work anymore. My real name's Wyatt Earp.

Roy O'Bannon

Come on. We're men, we're not pinatas!

Roy O'Bannon

You've lost your "winging it" privileges!

Roy O'Bannon

Chon Wang: What happened?
Roy O'Bannon: Oh nothing I just killed him, how'd you do?

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Shanghai Noon Quotes

How about that? It's a Mexican standoff. Only we ain't got no Mexicans.

Marshal Nathan Van Cleef

Roy O'Bannon: Ooooh... who's the pretty lady?
Chon Wang: That's my wife!
Roy O'Bannon: How long you been in this country?
Chon Wang: Four days.
Roy O'Bannon: Nice work.

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