...I'm Sorry Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.

Mr. Garrison

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South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut Quotes

Cartman: Mom? If you were in a German "scheisse" video, you... you'd tell me, right?
[short pause]
Mrs. Cartman: Sure, hon.

Satan: Is sex the only thing that matters to you?
Saddam Hussein: I love you.