Jules, y'know, honey... this isn't real. You know what it is? It's St. Elmo's Fire. Electric flashes of light that appear in dark skies out of nowhere. Sailors would guide entire journeys by it, but the joke was on them... there was no fire. There wasn't even a St. Elmo. They made it up. They made it up because they thought they needed it to keep them going when times got tough, just like you're making up all of this. We're all going through this. It's our time at the edge.


Kirby: It's true love, my friend.
Kevin: Love, love, you know what love is? Love is an illusion created by lawyer types like yourself to perpetuate another illusion called marriage to create the reality of divorce and then the illusionary need for divorce lawyers.

Never trust a woman who says she isn't angry.


Kevin: Well, you're all I think about.
Leslie: Me?
Kevin: And I think the reason I'm not interested in other women, and why I haven't had sex in so long, is because I'm desperately, completely in love with you.

You break my heart. Then again, you break everyone's heart.


Dale: Kirby! How are you?
Kirby: I'm obsessed thank you very much.

Kevin: How come you never ask me if I want a date?
Naomi: I thought you were gay!

Alec: You're being arrested for drunk driving.
Billy: Drunk definitely, I don't know if you could call it driving

Alec: You cannot have the Pretenders' 1st album! That's mine.
Leslie: I bought it.
Alec: You did not! You can have all the Billy Joels... except The Stranger.
Leslie: I'm taking Thriller and Mahler's ninth.
Alec: Kevin is so fond of Mahler.
Leslie: I moved in with Jules.
Alec: Oh how nice, rommies again... No Springsteen is leaving this house! You can have all the Carly Simons.
Leslie: You got me those for Valentine's Day. Remember?
Alec: You ran out on this relationship. You take the consequences.
Leslie: I didn't run out on anything. You ran out.

Jules: Don't you enjoy anything anymore... like girls?
Kevin: I enjoy being afraid of Russia. It's a harmless fear, but it makes America feel better, Russia gets an inflated sense of national worth from our paranoia. How's that?

Alec: You walked out on this relationship.
Leslie: I didn't walk out. You walked out.
Alec: You fucked Kevin!
Leslie: You fucked many!
Alec: Nameless, faceless many.
Leslie: Thank you. I feel much better now.

Men... Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.


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St. Elmo's Fire Quotes

Fluff and fold, buddy. Soon as I make it really big, I'm going fluff and fold.


Alec: You're being arrested for drunk driving.
Billy: Drunk definitely, I don't know if you could call it driving