Calm down, calm down. She likes you. She wants to suck on your penis. That's a good thing.

Evan

Seth: Its like a three thing... its like ball, dick, ball.
Evan: It's like a division sign... I just wish you would take those off.

Evan: Yeah chicks go nuts for that... the male camel toe.
Seth: Yea yea! The camel tail.

Becca: Your cock is so smooth!
Evan: Your's would be too... if you were a man.

Becca: [drunkenly making out with Evan] I *so* flirt with you in math.
Evan: Tell me about it. I - same-sies.

Seth: Yeah, but it doesn't actually show dick going in which is a huge concern.
Evan: I didn't realize that.

Ah, McLovin, McLovin, McLovin, McLovin.

Officer Michaels

I'm sorry that I blocked your cock...

Officer Slater

Liquor Store Clerk: Is there a problem here sir?
Fogell: [shakes head] No.
Liquor Store Clerk: [looks down at the spilled beer on the floor] Sir, did you do this?
Fogell: No, no I didn't and you should really clean this up, someone could really hurt themselves
[walks away]
Liquor Store Clerk: [looks down at the floor and shakes his head a little] Fuck my life

Fogell: Can we shoot at it?
Officer Slater: I don't know...
[pause]
Officer Slater: Can you?

Evan: Yeah chicks go nuts for that... the male camel toe.
Seth: Yea yea! The camel tail.

I don't know if we should be doing anything too official.

Evan

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Superbad Quotes

[imitating Becca] Oh Evan, thank you for bringing that lube for my pussy. I never would've been able to handle your four inch dick inside my pussy without that gigantic bottle of lube.

Seth

Seth: Look at those nipples.
Evan: They're like little baby toes. It's just not fair that they get to flaunt that stuff, you know... and like, I have to hide every erection I get.