McLovin? Were you violating that young girl? Were you violating her with you penis?

Officer Slater

Jules: You scratch our backs, we'll scratch yours.
Seth: Well, funny thing about my back, is it's located on my cock.

I arrested a man-lady who was legally named Phuck.

Officer Slater

I'd give my middle nut to start dating Becca.

Evan

Officer Slater: Ethnically, was he like uh... uh... African?
Liquor Store Woman: Was he African? He was like you.
Officer Michaels: He's Jewish, so we have an African Jew wearing a hoodie.

Oh my God! That's the coolest fucking story I've ever heard in my life! Can you tell it again, do you have time?

Seth

It's like a division sign.

Evan

Becca: Your cock is so smooth!
Evan: You would too... if you were a man.

Evan: It's not just making them smaller. They completely reshaped them. They make them more supple, symmetrical.
Seth: I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's make a move.

You know when you hear girls say 'Ah man, I was so shit-faced last night, I shouldn't of slept with that guy?' We could be that mistake!

Seth

Officer Michaels: McLovin?
Officer Slater: [pause] That's such a cool name.
Officer Michaels: I know. It sounds like a sexy hamburger.

Ah, McLovin, McLovin, McLovin, McLovin.

Officer Michaels

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Superbad Quotes

[imitating Becca] Oh Evan, thank you for bringing that lube for my pussy. I never would've been able to handle your four inch dick inside my pussy without that gigantic bottle of lube.

Seth

Seth: Look at those nipples.
Evan: They're like little baby toes. It's just not fair that they get to flaunt that stuff, you know... and like, I have to hide every erection I get.