What does a snail have to do to reincarnate? Leave the perfect trail of slime?

Edward Cole

We live, we die, and the wheels on the bus go round and round.

Edward Cole

Edward Cole: Do you hate me?
Carter Chambers: Not yet.

Just because I told you my story, does not invite you to be a part of it!

Edward Cole

Thomas: I'm proud of you.
Edward Cole: Nobody cares what you think.

Edward Cole: I want my own room.
Thomas: You run hospitals, not health spas. Two beds to a room, no exceptions.

Thomas: What the hell are you doing here?
Carter Chambers: Fighting for my life. You?

Edward Cole: The sequel was like that. She never backed me up on anything.
Carter Chambers: The sequel?
Edward Cole: The second Mrs Edward Cole.
[Carter rolls his eyes]
Edward Cole: Hell, that woman hated me.
Kyle the parachutist: Maybe because you called her the sequel.

Dr. Hollins: How are you doing?
Edward Cole: Dumb question.

I hate your rotten guts!

Carter Chambers

Edward Cole: Here's something to remember when you're older Thomas - never pass up a bathroom, never waste a hard-on, and never trust a fart.
Thomas: I'll remember that when I start "decrepitating" sir.

Carter Chambers: What are you so afraid of?
Edward Cole: Just because I told you my story, does not invite you to be a part of it!
Carter Chambers: Oh, like the lady in the bar?
Edward Cole: That's different.
Carter Chambers: Tell me how it's different.
Edward Cole: I build a billion dollar business up from NOTHING! Presidents have asked my advice, I have dined with royalty, and i'm supposed to make out like what? This trip was supposed to MEAN something to me? Like it was gonna change ME? How did you see it playing out Carter, I knock on the door, she answers, she's surprised and angry, but I tell her how much I love her and miss her, and OH, by the way, I'm gonna be dead soon so I'm reaching out to you because I don't wanna die alone?
Carter Chambers: Everyone's afraid to die alone.
Edward Cole: I'm not everyone! This was supposed to be fun. That's all it ever was.

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The Bucket List Quotes

You measure yourself by the people who measure themselves by you.

Carter Chambers

Thomas: I'm proud of you.
Edward Cole: Nobody cares what you think.