Friends don't fuck with each other's business.

Kelly

God, I just wanna bang hot chicks!

Eli

Always leave 'em wanting more.

Kelly

I could make a better sex-ed film with my mom!

Eli

Just go with it.

Danielle

Woman: [voiceover] How do you want me?
Man: Oh, that's good. Yeah. Just, uh... just get comfortable.
Woman: I'm a little nervous.
Man: Nah, you're doing great.

Danielle: Ooh, boxers.
Matthew: I always wear boxers. You just caught me on a weird day.

What's the craziest thing you've done lately?

Danielle

Matthew: Oh my god, she's so hot.
Eli: What channel, dude?

Matthew: Do you have the fever?
Klitz: No. Why? Do you?
Matthew: I don't know. Maybe.
[turns to Eli]
Matthew: How 'bout you?
Eli: I just gotta fuck something.

Man, there is some talent here. You get those girls together with those assbags right there and shoot 'em humping at, like, a football game or at a prom, that video would sell. Fuck, I'm good! How do I get these ideas? It's like a gift, you know? It's like I can't control it.

Kelly

Film School Student: Why'd you skip film school? Don't you think you're a little young?
Eli: Shut the fuck up. Next question.

FREE Movie Newsletter

The Girl Next Door Quotes

Matthew: It's not funny.
Danielle: It's a little funny.

Excuse me.
[makes out with Danielle]

Matthew