Rick: [talking about Alex] I swear that kid gets more and more like you every day.
Evelyn: You mean more attractive, sweet and devilishly charming?
Rick: No. He's driving me crazy.

Evelyn: Would you like to know what heaven looks like?
Rick: Later.

Alex: [trying to start the car] Come on, come on!
[Johnathan turns the key and breaks it off]
Alex: You broke it, you broke it, you broke it!
Jonathan: Be quiet Alex! If there's going to be any hysterics, they'll come from me!

[Evelyn has just kicked a poisonous snake towards Rick]
Rick: Those are poisonous, you know.
Evelyn: Only if they bite you.

Rick: You know, it's not easy being a... dad.
Alex: Yeah. But you do it real good.

Alex: Hey. The Book of the Dead.
Meela: What a bright little child. Your mother must be missing you terribly. If you wish to see her again, you better behave.
Alex: Lady, I don't behave for my parents, what makes you think I'm going to do it for you?
Lock-Nah: Silence!
Meela: Because your parents wouldn't slip poisonous snakes in your bed while you were sleeping.

Rick: Right, she's a reincarnated princess and I'm a warrior for God?
Ardeth Bay: And your son leads the way to Ahm Shere. Three sides of the pyramid. This was all preordained thousands of years ago.
Evelyn: But how does the story end?
Ardeth Bay: Only the journey is written, not the destination.
Rick: Convenient.

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The Mummy Returns Quotes

Alex: My dad is going to kick your ass.
Imhotep: I do not think so.

Alex: Hey. The Book of the Dead.
Meela: What a bright little child. Your mother must be missing you terribly. If you wish to see her again, you better behave.
Alex: Lady, I don't behave for my parents, what makes you think I'm going to do it for you?
Lock-Nah: Silence!
Meela: Because your parents wouldn't slip poisonous snakes in your bed while you were sleeping.