Special Olympics Athlete: You're a faker.
Thomas: A mother-faker!
Steve Barker: Jeffy doesn't understand! Jeffy cocoa for cuckoo pops, uhh... Jeffy...
Special Olympics Athlete: Shut up you stupid a-s-s!

Lynn Sheridan: [to David] Go away, asshole!
Billy: [laughs] Lynn said A hole with S's!

Give Mr. Steve a Stavi goodbye.

Stavi

Glen: Hi I'm Glen. Guess how many fingers I have?
Gary: Ten.
Glen: No. I have eight and two thumbs.

Glen: I work at Burger King.
Gary: You want fries with that.

I would definitely bring protection.

Thomas

My name is Lance, and I like nuts!

Steve Barker

Goodbye, Hooker Lady!

Thomas

Peter's another name for weaner.

Steve Barker

I've seen better acting in a porno.

Mark

We need to come up with a slogan. You know, like "Life is like a box of chocolates," or "Take my hands, boss." Like that monster tard off of "Green Mile."

Gary

This is my doberman candy.

Thomas

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The Ringer Quotes

Thomas: JIMMY! Can I have your autograph?
Jimmy: Get it off eBay!
Thomas: Who is eBay?

You scratched my CD! You picked it up in pure daylight and you scratched it!

Billy