Favorite Van Wilder Quotes
In my country, a woman's mastery of her gastronomical releases is considered the ultimate aphrodisiac!Taj
You shouldn't take life to seriously. You'll never get out alive.
Vance Wilder, Sr.: Where can I find Van Wilder?
Wasted Guy: In the Guinness Book of World-fucking-Records, man... under "Raddest Fucking Dude Alive"!
Vance Wilder, Sr.: Ok. Thanks.
Wasted Guy: In any one of these three rooms, Gramps.
Are you stalking me? Because that would be super.
Her name's Naomi. That's "I moan" backwards.
Van Wilder: What's that intoxicating scent you're wearing Doris?
Ms. Doris Haver: I have cats.
Van Wilder: Meow!
Gwen: What was that girl, a freshman?
Van Wilder: She reads at a sophomore level.
The first day of spring semester. A time to say goodbye to the parents once again, and say hello to a few new student bodies.
Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
Gwen: [Mouths] What are you doing here?
Van Wilder: [Mouths] I don't know!
Congratulations Taj, your first blow job!
Van Wilder: Take your clothes off.
Gwen: I'm not taking off my clothes.
Van Wilder: Well it is the naked mile run, everybody else is in their birthday suit.
[a hairy naked guy runs by]
Van Wilder: Except that guy.