Favorite Varsity Blues Quotes
Jonathan Moxon your are under arrest for not being naked with some sophomore chick who wants to bathe you with her tongue, now take off your clothes and get in the car.
Charlie Tweeder
Ladies, shut up and hold on to your nipples!
Charlie Tweeder
Charlie Tweeder: Will you listen to me? Bitches are all just panty droppers. You understand? That's it.
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: Listen. You give 'em Percocet, two Vicoden and a couple of beers, and the panties drop. It's very nice.
Mox: [laughing] It's nice.
Charlie Tweeder: [emphatically] It's nice.
Mox: Tweeder, you think you'll enjoy prison?
Charlie Tweeder: [not paying attention] I don't know.
[looks up]
Charlie Tweeder: What?
A 10... a 10... a fucking 10!
Billy Bob
If we go out and half-ass it 'cause we're scared, then we'll always wonder if we were really good enough. But if we go out there and give it all we've got... that's heroic. You guys wanna be heroes?
Jonathon "Mox' Moxon
Miss Davis: Can anyone tell me a common slang term for the male erection?
Student: Boner? Is boner one?
Miss Davis: Yes! Boner is good, boner is very good!
Billy Bob: I sure do love that dog.
Mox: I think it's a pig.
Billy Bob: Yeah.
Jonathon "Mox' Moxon: The male erection. Pitchin' a tent, sportin' a wood, stiffie, flesh rocket, tall tommy, Mr. Morbis, the march is on, icycle has formed, Jack's magic beanstalk, rigor mortis has set in, Mr. Mushroom-head, mushroom on a stick, purple headed yogurt slinger... oh, and a pedro.
Miss Davis: ...a pedro?
Mox: yeah, uh huh.
Your daddy was a no-talent pussy, but at least he listened!
Coach Bud Kilmer
[Mooning Mox and Billy Bob through the truck window] Good moonin! Good moonin! I have been up since the crack of dawn and I had to *ass* you a question.
Charlie Tweeder
You got to be the dumbest smart kid I know.
Coach Bud Kilmer
It's a strip club, man. I'm here to work!
Billy Bob
