Charlie Tweeder: Hey you wanna see the new Tweeder end zone dance?
[Tweeder dances]
Charlie Tweeder: You know what it's called?
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: The new Tweeder end zone dance.

You got to be the dumbest smart kid I know.

Coach Bud Kilmer

I don't want your life!

Mox

It makes me wonder if you know the different between a sneeze and a wet fart!

Bud Kilmer

Never show weakness, the only pain that matters is the pain you inflict.

Bud Kilmer

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Varsity Blues Quotes

Charlie Tweeder: Will you listen to me? Bitches are all just panty droppers. You understand? That's it.
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: Listen. You give 'em Percocet, two Vicoden and a couple of beers, and the panties drop. It's very nice.
Mox: [laughing] It's nice.
Charlie Tweeder: [emphatically] It's nice.
Mox: Tweeder, you think you'll enjoy prison?
Charlie Tweeder: [not paying attention] I don't know.
[looks up]
Charlie Tweeder: What?

You got to be the dumbest smart kid I know.

Coach Bud Kilmer