Willy Wonka: But Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he always wanted.
Charlie Bucket: What happened?
Willy Wonka: He lived happily ever after.

Mr. Beauregarde: Violet, what are you doing now? You're blowing up!
Violet Beauregarde: I feel funny!
Grandpa Joe: I'm not surprised.

I've just decided to switch our Friday schedule to Monday, which means that the test we take each Friday on what we learned during the week will now take place on Monday before we've learned it. But since today is Tuesday, it doesn't matter in the slightest. Pencils ready!

Mr. Turkentine

Little surprises around every corner, but nothing dangerous. So don't be alarmed. As soon as your outer vestments are at hand, we'll begin.

[singing] If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it. Anything you want to, do it; want to change the world... there's nothing to it.

It happens every time, they all become blueberries.

I feel very sorry for Wonka. It's gonna cost him a fortune in fudge.

Augustus Gloop

Willy Wonka: Don't you know what this is?
Violet Beauregarde: By gum, it's gum.
Willy Wonka: Wrong! It's the most amazing, fabulous, sensational gum in the whole world.
Violet Beauregarde: What's so fab about it?
Willy Wonka: This little piece of gum is a three-course dinner.
Mr. Salt: Bull.
Willy Wonka: No, roast beef. But I haven't got it quite right yet.

Bubbles, bubbles everywhere, but not a drop to drink - yet.

The suspense is terrible... I hope it'll last.

Veruca Salt: I wanted to be the first to find a Golden Ticket, Daddy!
Mr. Salt: I know, angel. We're doing the best we can. I've got every girl in the place to start hunting for you.
Veruca Salt: All right, where is it? Why haven't they found it?
Mr. Salt: Veruca, sweetheart, I'm not a magician! Give me time!
Veruca Salt: I want it now! What's the matter with those twerps down there?
Mr. Salt: For five days now, the entire flipping factory's been on the job. They haven't shelled a peanut in there since Monday. They've been shelling flaming chocolate bars from dawn till dusk!
Veruca Salt: Make them work nights!

Mr. Salt: Wonka, how much do you want for the golden goose?
Willy Wonka: They're not for sale.
Mr. Salt: Name your price.
Willy Wonka: She can't have one.
Veruca Salt: Who says I can't?
Mr. Salt: The man with the funny hat.

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Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory Quotes

Of course you don't know. You don't know because only *I* know. If you knew and I didn't know, then you'd be teaching me instead of me teaching you - and for a student to be teaching his teacher is presumptuous and rude. Do I make myself clear?

Mr. Turkentine

Charlie Bucket: Hey, the room is getting smaller.
Mrs. Teevee: No, it's not. *He's* getting *bigger*!
Mr. Salt: He's at it again!
Mike Teevee: Where's the chocolate?
Sam Beauregarde: I doubt if there is any.
Mr. Salt: I doubt if any of us will get out of here alive.
Willy Wonka: Oh, you should never, never doubt what nobody is sure about.
Mrs. Gloop: You're not squeezing me through that tiny door!
Mr. Salt: You're off your bleeding nut, Wonka. No one can get through there!