Jim Lovell: Freddo, how long does it take to power up the LEM?
Fred Haise, Sr.: Three hours by the checklist.
Jim Lovell: We don't have that much time.
Fred Haise: It hurts when I urinate.
Jim Lovell: Well, you're not getting enough water.
Fred Haise: No, I'm drinkin' my rations, same as you... I think old Swigert gave me the clap. Been pissin' in my relief tube.
Jim Lovell: Well, that'd be a hot one at the debriefing for the flight surgeons... Another first for America's spacemen.
Ken Mattingly: 13, this is Houston, do you read?
Jim Lovell: Roger that, Ken. Are the flowers blooming in Houston?
Ken Mattingly: That's a negative, Jim. I do not have the measles.
Jim Lovell: Gentlemen, what are your intentions?
[Jack Swigert and Fred Haise turn around]
Jim Lovell: I'd like to go home.
Lunar module has just become a lifeboat.Gene Kranz
Gentlemen, it's been a privilege flying with you.Jim Lovell
Jack Swigert: Uplink completed. We got her back up, Ken. Boy, I wish you were here to see it.
Ken Mattingly: I'll bet you do.
Reporter: So... the number 13 doesn't bother you?
Fred Haise, Sr.: Only if it's a Friday, Phil.
Reporter: Apollo 13 - lifting off at 1300 hours and 13 minutes, and, entering the moon's gravity on April 13th.
Jim Lovell: Uh, Ken Mattingly has been doing some... scientific experiments regarding that very phenomenon, haven't you?
Ken Mattingly: Well, uh, yes, well I uh, had a black cat walk over a broken mirror under the lunar module ladder, didn't seem to be a problem.
Fred Haise, Sr.: We also consider a real helpful letter we got from a fellow who said we ought to take a pig up with us for good luck.
Jim Lovell: Uh, Houston, we are ready for the beginning of PTC, and I think once we're in that barbecue roll, Jack and I will eat.
Fred Haise, Sr.: Hey, I'm hungry.
Jim Lovell: Are you sure?
Fred Haise, Sr.: I could eat the ass out of a dead rhinoceros.
Patty: How do you go to the bathroom in space?
Jim Lovell: Well, um... I tell you it's a very complicated procedure that involves cranking down the window and looking for a gas station.
Well, I... damn. Medical guys. I had a feeling when they started doing all the blood tests that I... I mean, I know it's their asses if I get sick up there but I mean JESUS!Ken Mattingly
Sy Liebergot: Flight... I recommend we shut down reactant valves to the fuel cells.
Gene Kranz: What the hell good is that gonna do?
Sy Liebergot: If that's where the leak is, we can isolate it. We can save what's left in the tanks and we can run on the good cell.
Gene Kranz: You close 'em, you can't open 'em again! You can't land on the moon with one healthy fuel cell!