Ooh, a Mini-Doris! I didn't know you could do that!

Bowler Hat Guy

Can Marion be a boy's name?

Bowler Hat Guy

Fritz: Look, honey, Italian food!
Petunia: I WANTED A SLOPPY JOE!

Lewis: Wait, what does Cornelius look like?
Wilbur: ...Tom Selleck.

[to Wilbur] Mister, you are grounded... until you die.

Franny

[to Lewis] I'm not allowed to look at the time machine, let alone drive it!

Wilbur

Little Doris now sleeps with the fishes.

Bowler Hat Guy

Dude... I cannot take you seriously in that hat...

Wilbur

Lewis: Why is your dog wearing glasses?
Grandpa Bud: Oh, because his insurance won't pay for contacts.

If my parents figured out I brought you from the past, they'll bury me alive and dance on my grave!

Wilbur

Lewis: Goob, I had no idea!
Bowler Hat Guy: Shut up! And don't call me "Goob"! How many evil villians do you know that can pull off a name like "Goob"? Bleh!
Lewis: Look, I'm sorry your life turned out so bad. But don't blame me you messed it up yourself. You just focused on the bad stuff when all you had to do was... let go of the past and keep moving forward...
Bowler Hat Guy: Hmm, let's see... take responsiblity for my own life or blame you? Dingdingdingdingding! Blame you wins hands down!

Mom and Dad are gonna kill me! And I'm gonna tell you this, it will not be done with mercy!

Wilbur

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