Todd Wolfhouse: Jim Tobleson said they called in a hostage negotiator
Landfill: Jim Tobleson's a fucking Chatty Cathy! I did my three years up at the county pen. Made some friends, went Muslim. Now I'm out, praise Allah.

I'll show you how to chug a beer, mother fucker!

Steve "Fink" Finklestein

Todd Wolfhouse: We've got to go back and get grandpa's ashes.
Jan Wolfhouse: You go, I'm never leaving this place.

I always sleep better with a little sausage in me.

Great Gam Gam

Barry Badrinath: It's $10 for a BJ, $12 for an HJ, $15 for a ZJ...
Landfill: [Interrupting] What's a ZJ?
Barry Badrinath: If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein: [Trying to persuade Landfill] I've got $4.

I wish it were winter so we could freeze it into ice blocks and skate on it and melt it in the spring time and drink it!

Barry Badrinath

[upon waking up after the first night of training, next to a deer he killed with his teet] Oh no, not again!

Barry Badrinath

Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath? Who's Barry Badrinath?

Landfill

Why don't we get you out those wet clothes, and into a dry martini.

Barry Badrinath

Where's home? It's gone! Someone stole it!

Boog

Look at me! I'm a doe and I'm a buck. I'm a DUCK!

Elliot

Boog: Yeah, we'll need your nuts!
Elliot: And your acorns, too!

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