Look, I really don't think they flew 90 billion light years to come down here and start a fight. Get all rowdy.

Captain Steven Hiller

Albert Nimzicki: I'm not Jewish.
Julius Levinson: Well, nobody's perfect.

Now that's what I call a close encounter .

Captain Steven Hiller

Y'know, this was supposed to be my weekend off, but noooo. You got me out here draggin' your heavy ass through the burnin' desert with your dreadlocks stickin' out the back of my parachute. You gotta come down here with an attitude, actin' all big and bad... and what the hell is that smell? I could've been at a barbecue! But I ain't mad.

Captain Steven Hiller

A toast, to the end of the world.

David Levinson

Gen. Gray: Mr. President, I'd sure like to know what you're doing.
President Thomas Whitmore: I'm a combat pilot, Will. I belong in the air.

Capt. Jimmy Wilder: You scared, man?
Captain Steven Hiller: No. You?
Capt. Jimmy Wilder: No. Hold me.

I'm just a little anxious to get up there and whoop E.T.'s ass.

Captain Steven Hiller

Oh god, I hope they bring back Elvis.

Elvis Fanatic

Captain Steven Hiller: Was that an earthquake?
Jasmine Dubrow: Not even a four pointer. Go back to sleep.

Let's kick the tires and light the fires, big daddy!

Capt. Jimmy Wilder

David Levinson: Hey, you have any idea how long it takes for those cups to decompose?
Julius Levinson: If you don't move soon, I'm gonna start to decompose.

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