Ladies and Gentlemen! Welcome to the Biff Tannen Museum! Dedicated to Hill Valley's #1 Citizen. And America's greatest living folk hero. The one and only Biff Tannen. Of course we've all heard the legend, but who is the man? Inside you will learn how Biff Tannen became the richest and most powerful man in America. Learn the amazing history of the Tannen family, starting with his great-grandfather, Buford 'Mad Dog' Tannen, the fastest gun in the West. See Biff's humble beginnings and how a trip to the race track on his 21st Birthday made him a millionaire overnight. Share in the excitement of a fabulous winning streak that earned him the nickname "The Luckiest Man on Earth." Learn how Biff parlayed that lucky winning streak into the vast empire called Biffco. Discover how, in 1979, Biff successfully lobbied to legalize gambling and turned Hill Valley's dilapidated courthouse into a beautiful casino-hotel!Television announcer
Lorraine Baines: Biff, somebody already asked me to the dance.
Biff Tannen: Who? That bug George McFly?
Lorraine Baines: I'm going with Calvin Klein, okay?
Biff Tannen: Calvin Klein? No, it's not okay!
Biff Tannen: Hold on. Let's get this straight. Marty is YOUR kid, not mine. And all the money in the world wouldn't do jack shit for that lazy bum!
Lorraine Baines: Stop it, Biff, just stop it!
Biff Tannen: Look at him. He's a butthead just like his old man was.
Lorraine Baines: Don't you dare speak that way about George! You're not even half the man he was.
I went to a rejuvenation clinic and got a whole natural overhaul. They took out some wrinkles, did hair repair, changed the blood, added a good 30 to 40 years to my life. They also replaced my spleen and colon. What do you think?Doc
Grandma Tannen: Biff, Biff, where you going, Biff?
Biff Tannen: I told you, grandma, I'm goin' to the dance.
Grandma Tannen: When are you coming home?
Biff Tannen: I'll get home, when I get home.
Grandma Tannen: Don't forget to turn off the garage lights!
Biff Tannen: You're supposed to be in Switzerland, you little son of a bitch!
Marty McFly: My father?
Biff Tannen: Did you get kicked out of another boarding school? Damn it, Lorraine, do you know how much perfectly good dough I blow on this no-good kid of yours, huh? On all three of them!
Lorraine Baines: What the hell do you care? We can afford it! The least we can do with all that money is provide a better life for our children!
Young Jennifer: How 'bout a ride, mister?
Marty McFly: Jennifer! Oh, man, are you a sight for sore eyes; let me look at you.
Young Jennifer: Marty, you're acting like you haven't seen me in a week.
Marty McFly: I haven't.
Marty McFly, Jr.: Hey, Gram, could you just stuff the whole thing in my mouth?
Middle-Aged Marty: Don't you be a smart-ass!
'Ronald Reagan' Video Waiter: Welcome to the Cafe 80's, where it's always morning in America, even in the afternoon. Our special today is mesquite-grilled sushi...
'Ayatollah Khomeini' Video Waiter: [interrupts] You must have the hostage special!
Marty McFly: Hey, hey, hey, hey, guys, hey, hey! All I want is a Pepsi.
Doc: Sometime today, old Biff will show up to give young Biff the Almanac. Above all, you must not interfere with that event. We must let Old Biff believe he succeeded, so that he'll leave 1955 and bring the DeLorean back to the future.
Marty McFly: Right.
Doc: Once Old Biff is gone, grab the Almanac anyway that you can. Remember, both of our futures depend on this.
Marty McFly: You don't have to remind me of that, Doc.
Young Doc: Nice talking to you. Maybe we can bump into each other sometime again in the future.
Older Doc: Or in the past.
Doc: Time circuits on.
Marty McFly: Time circuits on? What do you mean "Time Curcuits on"? Doc, we're not going back now!
Marty McFly: Doc, What about Jennifer? What about Einstein? We can't just leave them here.
Doc: Don't worry, Marty. Assuming we succeed in our mission, this alternate 1985 will be changed back into the real 1985, instantaneously transforming around Jennifer and Einie. Jennifer and Einie will be fine, and they'll have absolutely no memory of this horrible place.
Marty McFly: Doc... what if we don't succeed?
Doc: We must succeed.