John McClane: You throw quite a party. I didn't realize they celebrated Christmas in Japan.
Joseph Takagi: Hey, we're flexible. Pearl Harbor didn't work out so we got you with tape decks.

Oh my God, the quarterback is toast.


Hey babe, I negotiate million dollar deals for breakfast. I think I can handle this Eurotrash.

Harry Ellis

Businessman: You don't like flying, do you?
John McClane: What gives you that idea?
Businessman: You want to know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
John McClane: Fists with your toes?

Don't got the stones? You ignorant punk. I play for money. I owe rent. Child support. I play for money, not the fuckin' world series on ESPN.

Joey Knish

Let's start the hurley.

Mike McDermott

Aces full, Mike.

Teddy KGB

Mike McDermott: That's 4,400. I'm gonna call you. Or else, I won't respect myself tomorrow morning.
Teddy KGB: Respect is all you have left in the morning!

Nyet! Nyet! No More! No! Not tonight! This son of bitch, all night he, "Check. Check. Check." He trap me!

Teddy KGB

Worm: Now, what did I ever do to that guy?
Mike McDermott: You fucked his mother.

Mike McDermott: You comin' up?
Lester 'Worm' Murphy: No, I've been standin' out here all this time just to say hi.
Mike McDermott: All right, listen, things haven't been that smooth on the homefront so, you know, tone it down a little, all right?
Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Tone done what, motherfucker?

Like my uncle Les used to say, "When the money is gone, it's time to move on." So enjoy it, you secret handshaking assholes.


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