Adam: Cheers. (Taps date's wine glass)
Lucy: Oh thank you.
Adam and Lucy (Go to kiss, bangs head together instead): Oww.
Lucy: I'm so sorry. That was such a fail on my part. Wait, can we, I can do better than that, can we try again?
Adam: Sure. Mulligan. Let's, why don't we... (sit down on couch and start making out)
Lucy: Oh my god, this is happening, this is really happening, you're touching me...
Adam: Maybe we don't need to talk about everything.

I know what going on. You're all on the same cycle. This is very exciting. Your uterine walls will be shedding for the next three to five days.

Adam

(Said to Adam): Don't screw it up. Ten years from now you're going to be having sex with your wife and it's going to be in the missionary position and one of you is going to be asleep.

Emma (getting into cab): Take me to Adam's house.
Cab Driver: Where's that?
Emma: Where Adam lives.

Adam: My dad's dating my ex-girlfriend.
Emma: You told me about it last night.
Adam: Like in a charming way?
Emma: You were naked and crying.

Emma: Congrats? For what, having sex with you?
Adam: You did a good job, so... I thought you deserved a balloon.

We're sluts, Emma! We're dirty dirty sluts!

Shira

You look like a pumpkin, bitch!

Emma

Ronny: I am trying to fix this stuff.
Geneva: You are breaking more stuff.

[Comes in to the party with the bruise on his face]
Nick: Ronny
Beth: What happened to your face.
Ronny: Oh I just had this bar fight.
Nick: Bar Fight
Ronny: I got this place called Zips, Zips bar and grill.
Ronny: It is a place where liers and scumbags and all kind of weird stuff like a blow up of marriage hang out.

[Ronny trying to talk to Geneva]
Ronny: I saw you yesterday with a loser in a dead mill print t-shirt
Geneva: You think I want to go and see Zip.
Ronny: You found a guy in the city named Zip. Zip.
Geneva: The point is
[Ronny cuts her off]
Ronny: Who names their kid Zip. Zip.

[Ronny to Cousing Betty]
Ronny: Who are you?
Cousin Betty: I am cousin Betty.
Ronny: Are you first?
Cousin Betty: Second.

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