The fatties were the first to go.

Columbus

Fuck this clown

Columbus

I'm not great at farewells, so uh... that'll do, pig.

Tallahassee

[after his neighbor changes into a zombie] The first girl I let into my life and she tries to eat me.

Columbus

[flipping frantically through the Bible] This book doesn't have any answers!

Homer Simpson

Marge Simpson: Thanks for coming over.
Comic Book Guy: [happily] Thanks for giving me your pregnancy pants; I've never known comfort like this.

Hello, I'm Tom Hanks. The US Government has lost its credibility so it's borrowing some of mine.

Tom Hanks

Todd Flanders: I wish Homer was my father.
Ned Flanders: ...and I wish you didn't have the devil's curly hair.

Smithers... I don't believe in suicide, but if you'd like to try it, it might cheer me up to watch.

Montgomery Burns

Ned Flanders: Ok, boys, when you meet Jesus, be sure to call Him Mr. Christ.
Todd Flanders: Will Buddha be there?
Ned Flanders: No.

[after the Simpsons' house collapses into the sink hole] They're China's problem now.

Chief Wiggum

[in the voice of a cartoon mouse] I'm the mascot of an evil corporation!

Bart Simpson

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