Chau: [after the bullet falls back into the gun] Wait! There's really a bullet in the gun!
Starsky: [shouts] Yes? I know... That is the point of?Russian Roulette!

Hutch: What else can you tell me about the guys that hired you?
Chau: Not much. Couple of whiteys. Nice suits. They pay. I do job.
Hutch: What'd they look like?
Chau: I don't know. They're white. All you guys look alike to me.
Hutch: That's funny. All you guys look alike to us.

[kid throws a knife and hits Starsky] Ow! Oh, mama! What is your problem?


Starsky: Hey, Hutch, I beat that guy. What was that about?
Hutch: Sure you did. You won.
Starsky: You saw.
Hutch: You won. You danced your heart out.
Starsky: And everybody saw it.
Hutch: Shhh. Go to sleep.
Starsky: I was robbed.
Hutch: I know. Go to sleep. Go to sleep, tiny dancer.

Big Earl: [Starsky tries to bribe Big Earl] I'll tell you what, I do like your blonde friend here. Let me see your belly button.
Hutch: No. Let's go.
[hangs up the phone]
Starsky: Hold on a second. The guy's obviously a freak. Just show him a little skin. Show him your stomach. Nobody's here.
Big Earl: Are we cool?
Starsky: Yes, we're cool.
Big Earl: [Hutch shows his stomach] Oh, eureka. God, that's nice. It's like a little bowl of oatmeal with a hole in it. I got one too. I just got a little more brown sugar on mine.

Hutch: What do you hear on the street these days, Huggy?
Huggy Bear: Dig this. A little bird tells me there's gonna be a big coke deal in Bay City. One for the Guinness books. So they say.
Starsky: Interesting. Who would this little bird be?
Huggy Bear: Look man. I lay it out for y'all to play it out.
Starsky: All right. What does that mean?
Hutch: Don't worry about it.

Hutch: Look at all these cops. You really want to eat here?
Starsky: It's a great place. Pop's? Come on. If you're one of the cops you eat at Pop's.

Hutch: [after seeing the Grand Torino] Whoa! Your stock just went up in my book, my friend. Pop the hood, let me see what you got under...
Starsky: Hey! Hotshot! What do you think you're doing? This is a Ford Grand Torino. It's not some crappy camper slash apartment. There are rules.
Hutch: Okay, okay.
Starsky: You do not bang on the hood. You never under any circumstances drive. And you will certainly not put your coffee mug on the roof of the car. In fact, no coffee in the car whatsoever. Coffee goes on the ground, you get in the car, we go.

Huggy Bear: Hutch, you'll have the usual?
Hutch: You know it and make it a double.
Huggy Bear: Leon, get my a man a jack and tab. And double that.
Leon: You got it boss.
Starsky: Hey, I'll get a seltzer with a little lime if you got it.
Huggy Bear: I don't got it.
Starsky: Or not. That's cool. I'm good.

Hutch: [waiting outside Huggy's club] What, you've never run an errand on the clock before?
Starsky: No, I happen to take care of my personal business after work. When the taxpayers aren't paying me to protect them.
Hutch: Give me a break. You've never stopped and bought yourself a cup of coffee?
Starsky: I bring a thermos.

If this shit wasn't illegal guys, we'd be up for the Nobel Prize.

Reese Feldman

Do it.

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