Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.

Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: [takes hand lovingly] Jane, I REALLY need $50, can i have the $50?
Jane: [hesitant] ... No?
Kevin: [laughing] See? That was good!
[grabs Jane's drink]
Kevin: Jane, can I have your drink?
Jane: Sure.

Can you please find somebody else to be creepy with?


Kevin: What about you? You don't have any needs?
Jane: No. I'm Jesus.

What color is that - vomit?


Kevin: [in Jane's apartment, with her showing off her dresses as she pulls out a loud-looking Gone With The Wind dress] What is that?
Jane: [holding the dress up to herself] Theme wedding!
Kevin: What was the theme? Humiliation?

Who the fuck is Bambi?

Clarence 'Coffee' Black

If you see an opposum, kill it. It’s not a pet.

Jackie Moon

It feels like I got cat piss in my eyes.

Jackie Moon

Cover your sodas! Dewey loves sugar!

Jackie Moon

It's like the Titanic but with bears!

Jackie Moon

Landon: So, what's your number one?
Jamie: To marry in the church my mother grew up. It's where my parents were married.

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