11 Best Nightcrawler Quotes

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Nightcrawler gave Jake Gyllenhaal the movie role of his career, and of course, some of the best movie quotes he's ever had. 

Gyllenhaal stars as the title character, a man who criss-crosses the streets of Los Angeles every night trying to find the best at us being the worst, all for the morning local news. 

There are many Gyllenhaal moments that we'll be quoting for years to come, and here are our 11 favorite Nightcrawler quotes!

1. Lou Likes People, Not!

Jake gyllenhaal stars nightcrawler

What if my problem wasn't that I don't understand people but that I don't like them? What if I was the kind of person who was obliged to hurt you for this? I mean physically. I think you'd have to believe afterward, if you could, that agreeing to participate and then backing out at the critical moment was a mistake. Because that's what I'm telling you, as clearly as I can.

Lou Bloom
This quote captures Gyllenhaal's Lou in a heartbeat. And don't you just love his passive agressive nature?

2. Lou Looks for a Job

Jake gyllenhaal stars in nightcrawler

I'm looking for a job. In fact, I've made up my mind to find a career that I can learn and grow into. Who am I? I'm a hard worker. I set high goals and I've been told that I'm persistent. And I'm thinking, television news might just be something that I love as well as something I happen to be good at. Now I know that today's work culture no longer caters to the job loyalty that could be promised to earlier generations. But I believe that good things come to those who work their asses off and that good people who reach the top of the mountain, didn't just fall there.

Lou Bloom
What would Lou be good at? Let's ponder that...

3. Is Bill Paxton Hiring?

Nightcrawler bill paxton jake gyllenhaal

Lou Bloom: Will this be on television?
Joe Loder: Morning news, if it bleeds it leads
Lou Bloom: Are you currently hiring?

Gyllenhaal sees Paxton taping an accident and thinks it could be the life for him.

4. Lou Hires His First Employee

Nightcrawler stars jake gyllenhaal

Lou Bloom: I'm starting a TV news business. I film breaking stories. Maybe you saw my item this morning, a fatal car jacking.
Rick: No, I mean, I don't have a TV.
Lou Bloom: Do you have a cell phone?
Rick: Yeah
Lou Bloom: Does it have GPS?
Rick: Yeah
Lou Bloom: Congratulations, you're hired.
Rick: Okay

Does Rick have any idea what he's about to get into? Not even in the least!

5. Lou Is Loose With the Law

Jake gyllenhaal nightcrawler still photo

Rick: You've gotta call the cops.
Lou Bloom: And we will, at the right time. We're going to find the person that drove that car.

Lou should call it in, but of course, that won't bring ratings. First, he's going to tape the murder scene.

6. News As Screaming Woman

Nightcrawler jake gyllenhaal rene russo

Nina: We find our viewers are more interested in urban crime creeping into the suburbs. What that means is a victim, or victims, preferably well off and white, injured at the hands of the poor or minority.
Lou Bloom: Just crime?
Nina: No, accidents play, cars, busses, trains, planes, fires
Lou Bloom: But bloody
Nina: Well, graphic, the best and clearest way that I can phrase it to you, Lou, to capture the spirit of what we air is think of our newscast as a screaming woman, running down the street with her throat cut.
Lou Bloom: I understand.

Yup, Rene Russo's TV producer gets in a few great lines, but none better than this one.

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Nightcrawler Quotes

My motto is, 'if you want to win the lottery, you have to make the money to buy a ticket.

Lou Bloom

What if my problem wasn't that I don't understand people but that I don't like them? What if I was the kind of person who was obliged to hurt you for this? I mean physically. I think you'd have to believe afterward, if you could, that agreeing to participate and then backing out at the critical moment was a mistake. Because that's what I'm telling you, as clearly as I can.

Lou Bloom

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One of our Top 15 movies of 2014 is easily going to be one of our top 15 DVD/Blu-Ray releases of 2015 as Nightcrawler has come home. Jake...

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